Support Welcome

Wow, it's been a long time since either of us have posted anything. Sorry about that, there's been a lot going on in our personal lives. Panda's asleep, it's past midnight, and we've gotta be up early in the morning so I won't take too long here, just a quick update to let you know we're both still alive before I hit the hay. Just a quick note, this is copied and pasted from my journal entry on Sunday morning, so when I say last night I really mean Saturday night, I just can't be bothered to go back and change it now, I'm too tired. G'night.

Okay, I know this is probably gonna be long, but please read it, 'cos I don't know what to do.
I've spoken to Panda, and he's given me permission to post this here. I've been trying to write this all morning.

Pan has had manic depression since he was six years old because of his father. His whole life he's been led to believe that he's worthless, a burden and a waste of space. Until recently, Pandora's artwork is the only thing he's felt confident in. What he sells has been his main source of income, and in his mind the money he brings in from that is the only way he contributes to the family at all. On Friday there was a troll here on DA. Its account was deactivated by the admins on the same day it was created, but during the time it was online it added a piece of Pan's work to a collection it was describing as 'the shittiest work on all of DeviantART'. It was just a little doodle he had done purely for fun and was BY NO MEANS his best work, but it still affected him badly. I mean, what do you expect to happen if you tell someone who's spent their whole life being told they're worthless that their hard work isn't good enough? Yesterday Pan went into a severe art block [link] He was (and still is) scared of drawing anything for fear that it isn't gonna be good enough. His confidence in his drawing was completely shattered. As I said before, Pandora believes the money he brings in from art commissions is the only way he contributes to our family. If he can't draw, he has nothing to sell, and thus that income stopped. Yesterday he couldn't see himself getting out of the art block, and figured it would be easier on all of us if he just wasn't there anymore. So last night he tried to hang himself. We were lucky I got up there at time - if I had gone through with my plan to finish off some paperwork, and come up only two minutes later, I would have lost him forever. For a few terrifying moments I thought I had. I was so relieved when he was okay, and I haven't let him out of my sight since. However, he's still in a bad way and I'm scared.

Any advice and support is welcome.
Thankyou.

Back

Hey guys, I'm back from the business trip, I've actually been back since Wednesday, Pan had a little depressive episode so I came home early. Anyway, I've added a couple of bits to the collection - Lantern, which I wrote a couple of weeks ago and could've sworn I'd already put up, and Masochist, which I wrote a couple of hours ago and is what happens when I'm not thinking as I type and is most certainly not recommended for younger readers (not that they should be on here anyway considering the warning, and not that they'll be able to understand what's being suggested). I hope. Anyway, I wrote Masochist to take a break from the other stuff I've been writing recently, but I will be coming back to the 100 themes challenge some time in the near future. The Panda wants to do some meme thing with me first so it'll probably be after that, however long that takes. Wow it feels good being home again :) So I guess I'll see y'all around.

Work: NOT Just a Four-Letter Word

So, circumstance means that my brother Hitori and I are going to have to go on a business trip, back to Japan. (Because the clinic isn't my only job - if it were the Panda and me would be homeless) We'll be leaving next Monday and returning the following Friday, so I won't be online at all during that week (It'll probably be the case that neither of us are online that weekend either since I'll be desperate to give the Panda a good f***). On the other hand, while my computer access will be limited I will still try to add one of the themes from the 100 themes challenge every day, which the Panda will then upload here because we both have publishing rights on all pages. Why can I email him the themes and not come online? Because the only technology I'll be able to access is my mobile. I have a writing document thing and an email option, but otherwise no internet access. So, good luck with life and all, and I'll see you later.

Absence

I'm sorry about the inactivity recently. I'm just posting to let you know that the Panda and I won't be on at all for a little while, at most for a couple of months. Sadly the Panda was raped on his way home on Friday night. He's still in a lot of pain and hasn't left our bed since. This means that I've been working out with my sister-in-law to change and skip shifts at work in order to stay at home and look after him. This also means that updating this blog and writing things is currently the last thing on my mind until he recovers. Thankfully we've been getting a lot of support from family and friends, and physically, though he is still in a lot of pain, he is healing. Unfortunately the same can't be said for his mental well-being. As I'm sure you can imagine, what he's been through is a very traumatic experience, and I ask that you be supportive for him during this difficult time. Thankyou.

Almost done

So, I've almost finished with my work (finally). To finish my portfolio thingy all I need to do is print out the last few bits, which I can't do because the printer is broken and after that move we're broke and can't afford a new one. And those three days of work I have to do, the first of which went pretty well, I'm 99.9% sure I can finish it in just the two. So unfortunately for you you're not getting rid of me like I thought you were this morning. And on top of that our Firefox has decided to start working again (we had been using Safari, and Mitsukai still does), so smiles all around.

No, That's NOT What this Clinic is For

Well, there's a first time for everything I guess, but I never expected to come across this in my career.

My sister-in-law and myself run a small family-run clinic in London as our day job, my sister-in-law was running it on her own while the Panda and me were living in Japan, we both have degrees in medicine. Usually our customers are regulars, we're just their local clinic so they come to us when they have a problem. As such it's rare for us to see a new face there, normally at most just a family member of one of our regulars if they're staying for a while and get hurt or sick or whatever.

Our clinic is two minutes walk from a vets centre, and it's a pretty good one, it's the one me and Panda take the dog and the cat to if there's something up with them, and we would travel if we weren't happy with the sort of service we got. This morning a woman came in with a Chihuahua. One of the assistants came and got me to talk to her, since my sister-in-law was on her break and the receptionist was ill, we were short on staff. She told me she wanted a check-up, so I told her that she could give the dog to the assistant and I would take her in to give her one. She started getting distressed by this, and I told her that there was no possible way of taking animals through into the main part of the clinic because of the other patients, who may have had problems such as allergies or something else that would make an animal  potentially harmful to them. So the woman asked how she could get the check-up. It was at this point that the assistant and I realised that she had actually come in here purely to ask for a check-up for the ruddy dog.

We tried to explain to her that there was a vets only a short walk away and that she could take it there, this was a clinic for actual people. But she said that she didn't want to take her dog there, she wanted to take it to the clinic because one of her friends is apparently a regular and had told her about it. When we tried to insist that we couldn't do anything for the dog here, she actually threatened that she would sue us for refusing to service a paying customer. While I pointed out that we were perfectly within our rights the assistant made a decision that probably scarred her for life - she went to get my sister-in-law to sort out the problem.

My sister-in-law has a crazy short temper, and she really flares up when we interrupt something she deems important - such as talking to my brother on the phone while on her break about something she thinks we could've handled on her own. She came and got rid of the customer (I don't have a clue how, I fled as soon as she walked into the room), but then the assistant and me ended up getting a half hour long lecture about not interrupting her about menial things that we can sort out ourselves and aren't worthy of her attention.

So, all in all, a pretty hectic and weird morning.

Procrastinating again!

Considering the Grasshopper is supposed to be dissuading my procrastination, accepting my party request wasn't a good move